By: Juliana Ryan
Class of 2023
I often think about the future. Okay, I actually think about the future a lot. During our first weekend together on the kickoff retreat, we read a devotional from Paul David Tripp, and within the first few sentences, I knew God was onto something because he basically read my mind.
Tripp posed questions that have been rattling around in my brain like, “What will happen if…?” or “What will happen next?” and “What is down the road?”
My mind went to “What if I lose touch with my friends back home in Florida?”, “What if I don’t feel like I belong in Charlotte?”, “What if I don’t figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life within these nine months?!” I am exaggerating the last question, but it’s so easy to let our thoughts (and fears) spiral.
But in our time of reflection on this excerpt, one of the Fellows, Virginia Frances, shared that she wanted to live this year with the mindset of needing “just enough light for the next step.” Something simple, yet profound that has stuck with me in my first month of being in Charlotte.
Accepting the limitation that I don’t know the future, nor can I control it, usually brings about anxious, hurried thoughts, but I’ve been encouraged by Hebrews 12:1-2.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.”
Since starting the Charlotte Fellows, I’ve come to acknowledge parts of me, some weights, that can be laid aside by God’s grace and in this community of Fellows. Fear of the future does not have to define my thoughts or run my life.
I can trust God that he will give me enough light for the next step and that he will make my path sure. I just have to keep looking at Jesus and what he endured on the cross for me, and in doing so, will be made more like him, day by day, step by step.
For further listening ;) “Fear is Not My Future” by Maverick City Music
My host sis Ella and me at a tennis tournament!
Kathryn and me at the welcome dessert. :)